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Thursday, August 25th, 2005
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3:39 pm - wisdom teeth are a bitch
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that was hands down, the most painful experience of my entire life. i never expected wisdom teeth to hurt that much. it takes a lot of physical pain to get me to cry, ive dislocated toes, torn ligaments, broken bones, gotten stitches, had sinus surgery... but nothing has made me cry. i woke up, took one breath and started sobbing hysterically, she gave me 4 shots of morphine and a vicadin before i stopped, and i still can hardly handle it. im going to bed now/watching the oc dvd. they say i wont stop bleeding for a couple days, so ellie i guess im not going to the tennis match. if anyone wants to visit me/call me please do, lol. right now im working on trying to convince the "tooth fairy" that the four huge bloody teeth in a jar that they gave me are worth a new ipod, lol. i love you all. call me... or text cuz i cant really talk, lol. mwah
-meggy
current mood:  ow
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| Saturday, August 20th, 2005
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8:28 am - home again home again jiggity jig
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wide awake, cuz im used to waking up at 7 at KGS. alex is in the shower so i decided to come down here. wow its weird to be done with that place... im starting central in like 2 weeks. ill update more later, im gonna have to get people to read this thing again! love to all - meg
p.s. today is his 6 year anniversary..
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| Saturday, July 30th, 2005
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1:38 am - 3 random nice quotes. love to all - home for good in a month!
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"the first night how we slept with the light off
and all the stars shine above and all our clothes are on the floor
all the things that i feel that i can't describe..." -graham colton band
"we might kiss
when we are alone
when nobody's watching
we might take it home
we might make out
when nobody's there
it's not that we're scared
it's just that it's delicate" -damien rice
"where are we
what the hell
is going on
the dust has only
just begun
to fall
crop circles in the carpet
sinking
feeling.
spin me round
again
and rub
my eyes.
this can't
be happening." -imogen heap
current mood:  sleepy
current music: itunes on shuffle
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| Sunday, June 12th, 2005
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7:38 am - blaahhhhhh
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im wide awake even though i fell asleep at 4 because i'm so used to waking up early at school, so i decided to post! well, my flight came in last night at like 7:45 and i met my mum and jack at baggage claim, she dropped us off at cafe late and we ate lots. my stomach had hurt before we got there but i thought eating would help, and jack was full but well, eating is always fun. after we ate we started walking to blockbuster to rent a movie and i was almost in tears my stomach was hurting so bad. jack kept saying he felt sick too, but we both made it to blockbuster in one piece. so we rent closer, right? well as we're talking about who should rent it, jack goes "i'll rent it so my family can see it later" and the lady at the counter goes "they wont want to. its a horrible movie." and literally goes on and on about how horrible this movie (that happens to be one of our favorites) is. i turn to jack and tell him im about to throw up and im walking to bober to get tums and just walk away, lol. i get there and its closed but he catches up with me and we start to walk to wallgreens to try and save me. i dont think you understand how much my stomach was hurting. i felt like i had swallowed knives. right before we get to that little area of carribou/grand ole creamery, i turn to jack and say, "if we see anyone we know, im just gonna keep walking, so dont be freaked out" lol. well like in 2 minutes we saw annie and margit at caribou and i had to stop or i would seem like a psycho. oh yea, before that we had stopped at sa and i had bought tums and was eating them like candy, so when we saw them im standing there like hunched over with a roll of tums in my hand, hot, right? well we keep walking, and as we cross grand and get into the crocus area, jack bends over and throws up in some bushes. i start gagging but dont throw up. he throws up like 3 times and im dry heaving and like dying, lol. it was so crazy, and i know you all wanted to know that story, right? well we got to his house, and i sat on his couch while he brushed his teeth and got his yearbook and stuff, and then we drove the 3 blocks to my house LOL. we were that sick. so yea, the night goes on, yada yada yada, we watch my dance performances and the big musical numbers of pippin. then we popped in closer which gahh is just so good. it has two of my favorite people in the world (damien rice... kinda in it, and natalie portman... definitely in it) we both like orgasmed whenever natalie came on screen, lol and yea, then jack went home. good times, eh? im so not used to updating so im kinda iffy at it... well whatever. im tired too. im gonna go tho, ive gotta run lotso errands before graduation!
kissy kiss kiss! - meggy
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| Saturday, May 28th, 2005
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6:12 pm - hey babies!
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at the comfort inn in st. johnsbury killing time waiting for my brothers to call so i can tell them my grandpa died. wopee. love to all
-meggy
p.s. i'll coming home in two weeks for graduation!
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| Thursday, April 7th, 2005
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1:26 am - "ive been waiting for this day ALL DAY!"
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-joseph upon me coming to their house... hands down best quote ever
also as i was getting in my car, joseph yelled from the doorway:
"what does your car look like on the inside??"
"um... it looks like a regular car..."
"cool! ours looks like a regular car too!!"
"cool! bye joseph!"
"bye! (pause) dont get hurt! (pause) god bless you god bless you god bless you!"
alright kids, i gotta go finish packing
ill see lots of u at speeches tomorrow
kisses
-meggy
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| Wednesday, April 6th, 2005
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11:00 pm - not too shabby...
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*maybe that's all family really is. a group of people who miss the same imaginary place*
*i don't want to waste another moment of my life without you in it.*
*when i'm with you i feel so safe... like i'm home.*
-garden state
current mood:  spiderman-esque... ;)
current music: garden state soundtrack
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| Tuesday, April 5th, 2005
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11:15 pm - adventures in babysitting (not for the faint of heart)
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i havent updated in a few days cuz if i start talking about my past couple days i just start crying, dont ask me why. im officially calling my birthday a do-over and will celebrate it in a couple weeks, lol im not even kidding. so tonight i decide i have control over whether or not im having fun so i gather my brothers and we go to blockbuster to rent the south park movie. well when we walk back in the door my cat gets out and my brother and i spend forever rummaging in the bushes trying to catch him. we eventually do, and the second i put him inside, my other brother opens the door and the cat gets out again. me and crockett both start yelling at leonard just as a reflex, leonard gets upset and runs away. i go outside and try to find the cat, crockett tries to find leonard, and we both left the door open so my dog gets out, runs across the street and starts barking at this other ladys dog. the lady proceeded to call my dog a rascal and a pest, and i seriously considered running over her dog with my car. just kidding. not. so then we get lilly (the dog) back inside, leave the door open incase mica (the cat) returns, and crockett (the brother, haha im so clever) and i (the me... um yea) get in the car to find leonard. we do circles around the crocus blocks and go up and down grand until i decide to park and check inside wallgreens, and there he is... in is socks... wandering the isles of wallgreens. wtf. so i have to hide while crockett talks to him, cuz if he sees me there he'll run away again, eventually we get him in the car, go home, put in the movie, get like 5 minutes into it and hear this noise outside that sounds like dying children. lots of them. i run outside and see my cat all sick looking, i go to pick him up and he runs in the door. we all at the same time smell dog shit. but not before i had picked up my cat and gotten it all over me. i scream, drop him, he pees on the white living room carpet, and all of us start running after him to throw him in some sort of a tub. we lock him in the laundry room and crockett holds him while i examine where the poop is, when lo and behold, i realize that its not dog shit, its cat shit, from my own cats ass. my cat has nasty green diarriah all over his butt and down his tail and smeared on his stomach. YUMMY! i run warm water and grab some convenient old cloth baby diapers that are in a basket next to the sink basin-y thing, and start wiping the shit off my cat. he meows and squirms and does little scratchy things, and crockett drops him and picks him back up like 8 times before we get him clean. we go through like tons of baby diapers, and the second we finish, leonard opens the laundry room door and he runs out again. i chase him up to my bathroom (where his food and litterbox is) throw him a treat and slam the door. at that very second i hear my parents in the kitchen. i walk downstairs, tell them the whole story and my mom responds with "i had used those diapers earlier today to clean up lillys pee" i seriously almost burst into tears, lol i had had enough. instead i washed my hands really frickin well, walked into the library, sat down, ate like 33 and a half pixie sticks, and watched the south park movie, and now i have to go up and open my bathroom and see what damage the cat has done. (takes deep breath, crosses herself)
the end
current mood:  christ on a cracker
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| Saturday, March 26th, 2005
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7:58 am - spring break!
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hey kiddos!! im here in seaside, florida... its amazing here.. this is my second day. im staying here for a week, then going home!!! so yall best plan fun things to do w/me... also its gonna be my birthday (hint hint) lol jk! i miss you all SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO much and i cant WAIT to see you all! call my cell if you see this! love you all to pieces!
-meg
current mood:  cheerful
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| Saturday, February 26th, 2005
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11:17 pm - i drove 30 miles today just to get to a walmart
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HI ALL!!!!! im at the comfort in in st. j.... im on a one night little break thing. chris and i just watched the grudge... um holy fucking shit can i just say that i like shit my pantalones a little bit. alright... well.... i love you all a lot... some crazy lady just told me that i had to get off the comp cuz im not 21... but... i love all of u and clearly u dont love me cuz NO ONE HAS WRITTEN TO ME!!! not ONE SINGLE PERSON!!! oh well... ill see you ALL on march 30th... right before my bday... ehem ehem ehem.... alright kiddos - i love you!!!! MWAH!!!!
-meggie
current mood: (insert grudge boy noise here)
current music: the sound of the printer printing all jacks emails....
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| Friday, December 24th, 2004
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12:02 am - lying is the most fun a girl can have without taking her clothes off... but it's better if you do."
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hello children-
im back once again on holiday (hehe chris)
i got in last night after a freakishly long day of travel. heres the short version of the day. woke up at 5:45, got dressed, woke up jess and alex to say goodbye, and was driven down to get the boys by the all too excited bo (none of you know who bo is, but that's ok). we went down to eddy (the education building) to get our meds and meet up with brian, bryar, austin, james, fletch, and bjorn. chris went up there with them to say goodbye to me and bo was SO pissed when he saw him, lol. we still managed an exchange of plane letters and a quick kiss goodbye before bo sent him back to his dorm. after we all gathered we got onto the short bus (yes, my school has a short bus... or commonly referred to by grade schoolers as "the retard bus") and we went on our way. i quickly realized i had forgotten my purse and zoe and i convinced him that no matter what was in the purse, or how unimportant it was... it was my purse and i could not be seperated from it, so sarah powers (the night staff) drove it down to us cuz the short bus couldnt make it up the steep hill to the girls' dorms, lol. finally we got on our way, just as the sun was starting to rise over the mountains. it was one of the most beautiful sunrises i have ever seen. everyones eyes were glued through the frosted bus windows to the pink haze and orange streaks against the siloheted mountains. it was tres cool. the ride went on, and we dropped fletch off at the train station in white river junction (somewhere in the middle of vermont) and went on our way to manchester, nh. we listened to oldies and sang along, and eventually me and zoe fell asleep on eachother for the remainder of the ride. we got to the airport at like 9:30, checked in, and waited. for about 8 million and a half hours. or just 8. everyone left at different times until about 1 when it was just me and bo (yea... a little scary) but actually, it turned out to be really chill. we went to lunch and talked about good stuff. we chilled at my gate for like 2 hours until his flight, and then i was alone. i watched the sun set and waited. (its very bazaar to watch the sun rise and set without doing anything significant in between... it feels like a waste of an entire day of your life which is not something i ever intend to do again). i waited for another 2 hours. i talked to jack a little and chris a little and read 7 (yes 7.... no actually 8) magazines. good times. fast forward to the flight... the only window seat left was in the exit row, so as soon as i sat down i freaked out memorizing the procedure for what to do in case of an emergency... seeing as how the lives of all the people on the plane would be in my hands, lol (just in case you're wondering... you pull off the emergency handle cover, pull the red handle down towards you while holding the lower handle with the other hand - pull the door in, and rotate it to fit it through the opening. door weighs aproxamately 38 pounds.) lol... ocd what can i say. sooooo the flight was boring, lol the guy next to me watched the royal tenenbaums and i tried to inconspicuously watch along, until i got tired and decided to go to sleep. k, funny story, lol. i got all pissy cuz the guy next to me had his freakin light on and i wanted to sleep and couldnt really.... well...... at the very end of the flight - like seriously, 2 hours later... i actually look up and realize that its MY LIGHT THATS ON and I was probably pissing HIM off with it AND I COULD HAVE TURNED IT OFF THE WHOLE TIME... oh dear. i kno, im an idiot. but oh well. he drank 2 mini bottles of wine so im sure he really didnt care that much. oofta. this story is getting boring. yada yada yada - went home the end.
today was fun but boring. woke up and had an echo - woopdefrickingdoo.... they're actually pretty cool aside from all the cold jelly-ness. after that i went to my psychiatrist and then to the airport to pick up my auntie kristin! thennnnnn to juut to get my brows done, thennnnnn to cafe late for an early dinner with kristin and over to mendota heights to drop her off at my grandmas house. then home to get ready for going out tonight which consisted of jack and i haaj-ing to eagan to see 'closer'. fantastic btw, but first.... she freaking asked for my fucking drivers license and goes "you were born in 88... you have to be 17 to see this movie." so i buy i ticket to meet the faulkers instead and sneak all the way over to the other side of the theatre, lol. i almost crapped my pants when they kept coming in... i was so worried i would get caught and have to go see meet the faulkers alone, lol but everything was good. ok. so closer. um, amazing. i loved it. so did jack. and i didnt just love it because of all the damien-ness. although that was a good 50 percent of my lovingness. the other 50 percent was natalie portman. jk.... kinda.... kinda not. im kinda in love with her, lol jk. you also kinda see her pussy and kinda see jude laws dick but only kinda. like really. only like... shadows lol. so yea - go see the damn movie - its fucking awesome. so yea. thats about it. we listened to damien, then ani, then dashboard on the car home as i had multiple orgasms. lol jk - but now im off to have a bath... one thing i miss dearly when im at school... so yea. merry christmas everyone!
kisses and hugs,
joy love and peace.
-me
aka megan aka meg aka megs aka meggie aka hegny aka mk aka sara margaret aka bunches (hehe katie i love you bundles!!!!!)
current mood:  happy to be back
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| Saturday, November 27th, 2004
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4:44 am - im so flippin tired, i cant write anything...
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first, one quote from tonight:
“you guys are so clever… playing god with your tomagotchis” -rachel
as me and kate set the time back so they would be awake and could mate, lol
next, one note:
maddie - you are my hero. i cant express how proud i was tonight, except for the fact that you had me crying. i love you so much, and i miss you every day. im so glad i got to see you tonight and i am still awed by how amazing you are. you saved the entire show, and i hope you can see how flawless you were. im practically speechless - i love you sweetie!!!
last, some lyrics:
say goodnight not goodbye
you will never leave my heart behind
like the path of a star
i'll be anywhere you are
in the spark that lies beneath the coals
in the secret place inside your soul
keep my light in your eyes
say goodnight not goodbye
don't you fear when you dream
waking up is never what it seems
like a jewel buried deep
like a promise meant to keep
you are everything you want to be
so just let your heart reach out to me
i'll be right by your side
say goodnight not good-bye
goodnight darlings... ill see you soon enough.
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| Thursday, November 25th, 2004
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11:11 pm - its 11:11! make a wish!
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hey kids... happy thanksgiving! alright... im gonna start backward and work my way forward.... tuesday night i went to cafe late with jack for dinner, then we went to the girls varsity hockey game which was so much fun! we only stayed for the first period and the beginning of the second, but it was exciting and much fun to watch katie, callie, and jane... and all those other people but those were the only ones i really cared about, lol. also madeline but i didnt see her play, so yea. highlight of that part of the night was when katie entirely flipped over this girl... omg it was AWESOME, this girl just flipped over her stick and smacked the ice so hard.. it was awesome. dont worry, she was fine or i wouldnt think it was awesome. actually i probably still would, haha. so after that jack and i went back to his house and watched eternal sunshine.... ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh... i dont know what else to say except that thats the best movie ever and it puts me in the best mood and me and jack were both in just the perfect mood to watch it and we just had an awesome time. then jack walked me home and im not even gonna try to explain anything else cuz itll just sound dumb, but basically it was the best night of my life... honestly... i already wrote a baby entry saying how happy i was. for real.. dont really know how else to put it. it was just that everything was perfect. the end. well not the end, but the end of that night, lol... wednesday was fun.. i ran errands and got lost cuz i was talking on the phone with zoe, then i went to noodles with ellie and then to barnes and noble where we read magazines in the childrens isle cuz we're too cheap to just buy them, lol... thennn we drove to patina, lol ellie was mad cuz its across the street to patina, lol but it was wicked cold and i was wearing flip flops, so yea. we went into patina and a fab little shop next door that sold really cute expensive hats and mavi jeans and other things that make my life happy, lol. after that ellie dropped me off and i was supposed to leave right away but bri called and i got comepletely distracted talking to her about things and didnt leave for like half and hour, lol... needless to say we missed the first like 20 minutes of the bridget jones movie. it was only 20 minutes tho thanks to ellie's excellent driving... and going 80 thru north oaks where the speed limit most definitely never gets above 45, lol. the movie was alright.. cute but i liked the first better. after that i went home for a min, turned right around and picked up sam and went to panonos house. we did various things and drove around with sarah, nathan, eliot, tyler, and thomas (a new one to the group... or one i had never seen, lol.... um can i just say he was the most gorgeous boy ive seen in a long time? lol i kept finding myself just looking at him and then getting embarrased, lol im smooth like that) neway, we got taco bell and had fun. OH i had a close encounter with a deer in highland park... honestly i couldntve been more than a foot or two away from it. it was SO SCARY we all screamed and they made me pull over so we could all calm down, lol. umm.... after that we went to nathans and watched trainspotting... we didnt finish but what we did watch was fantastic, and i really wanna finish it soon. quote: "everything in this room is way too slippery to be comfortable" lol sarah said that as we sat on his like intensly slippery leather couch that we all just kinda slid off, and as we put our feet on the table and it just slid across the floor, lol... oh dear. so after all that i struggled with the one way streets in uptown trying to get to a gas station, and eventually made everything work and took sam home and went home myself. today was crappy for various reasons... i know i should be thankful tho so im not gonna focus on the crappy things that happened. im gonna make a list of all the things im thankful for instead. actually... that would take so long. ill just do a couple things im thankful for:
1. friends
2. family
3. vacation
4. my ipod
5. a house
6. heat
7. food
8. peppermint mochas
9. hbo
10. ballet
11. damien rice
12. stars
13. the moon
14. snow
15. burts bees
16. my health
17. chocolate
18. the word shady
(and just for vag's sake... the words wicked and mad, lol)
19. happiness
20. love
21. best friends
22. perfect moments
23. learning from mistakes
now for the extras::
ali's away message the other day:
Me: i like them tho they wil have good babies (becuase i control this n the sperm will listen to ME AND ONLY ME)
Megan: HAHAHAHAHAHA ali i love you
megan i love you!!!:-D
~~
then some snippets of convos:
SoccerSchwach: words dont do shit
SnowAngelGurl200: exactly
SoccerSchwach: even tho u wan tthem so badly to do everything
SnowAngelGurl200: EXACTLY
SoccerSchwach: i know tha feeling exactly
SoccerSchwach: its frustrating, but then it's not, cuz tha feeling is more than enuf, who needs words wen u feel like that
wise words^^
SnowAngelGurl200: my hearts fluttering right now
SnowAngelGurl200: i cant tell if it's my palpatations or if its that im in love
~~
SnowAngelGurl200: im happy enough to be sad for the rest of my life and still be ok because of this one night
~~
SoccerSchwach: keep venting its so cute
~~
SnowAngelGurl200: oh dear
SnowAngelGurl200: tres jealous
SnowAngelGurl200: they are far too cute
SoccerSchwach: i kno
SoccerSchwach: lol
SnowAngelGurl200: two beautiful people like that should not be allowed together
SnowAngelGurl200: it makes far too many people jealous
~~
Junkbud89: this is my dream
Junkbud89: be really really goregously hot, live in the OC be really really rich, have sex w/ adam brody aka seth cohen and ben aka ryan
Junkbud89: and any other boy that catches my fancy
SnowAngelGurl200: lol
SnowAngelGurl200: sounds good
SnowAngelGurl200: can i live with you?
Junkbud89: no you can be my neighbor
Junkbud89: cuz i dont want you accidently stumbling in upon me and adam having sex in the kitchen or anything
Junkbud89: cuz itd be a lil awkward
Junkbud89: for you
SnowAngelGurl200: ummm and i cant have sex with adam brody too?
Junkbud89: no you cannot
SnowAngelGurl200: ummmm
SnowAngelGurl200: i dont like this dream
SnowAngelGurl200: you cant have them both
Junkbud89: um
Junkbud89: yes i can
Junkbud89: because it's my dream
SnowAngelGurl200: fine whatever i get josh hartnett
~~
Junkbud89: i wanna fall in love and be gorgeous and have amazing sex
SnowAngelGurl200: i think everyone does darling
~~
roseycheeks217: do you think this happens to everyone?
SnowAngelGurl200: maybe... probably at some point in everyones life
SnowAngelGurl200: or maybe its only for the really lucky girls like us
roseycheeks217: hehe
roseycheeks217: thats what id like to think
~~
actormoviemagic: hide me in your love
~~
and now lyrics... im sure ive put these up before... every word of these... gah! k, enough:
breathe in for luck
breathe in so deep
this air is blessed
you share with me
this night is wild
so calm and dull
these hearts they race
from self control
your legs are smooth
as they graze mine
we're doing fine
we're doing nothing at all
my hopes are so high
that your kiss might kill me
so won't you kill me
so i die happy
my heart is yours to fill or burst
to break or bury
or wear as jewelery
which ever you prefer
the words are hushed lets not get busted
just lay entwined here
undiscovered
safe in here from all the stupid questions
hey did you get some
man that is so dumb
stay quiet
stay near
stay close they can't hear...
so we can get some
my hopes are so high that your kiss might kill me
so won't you kill me
so i die happy
my heart is yours to fill or burst
to break or bury
or wear as jewelery
which ever you prefer
hands down this is the best day i can ever remember
i'll always remember
the sound of the stereo
the dim of the soft lights
the scent of your hair that you twirled in your fingers
and the time on the clock
when we realized it's so late
and this walk that we shared together
the streets were wet
and the gate was locked
so i jumped it
and i let you in
and you stood at your door
with your hands on my waist
and you kissed me like you meant it
and i knew that you meant it
that you meant it
that you meant it
and i knew
that you meant it
that you meant it
alright. to bed i go. goodnight angels... and whoever made that last comment pleeeassssssssseeeeeee justsay who u are. i mean in general. er ima disable the ability to post if ur anonymous. or maybe i dont really care... i donno. im tired, lol. one more time goodnight
-mk
current mood:  kinda icky
current music: untitled - simple plan
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| Tuesday, November 23rd, 2004
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11:50 pm
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11:50 pm
im not going to explain anything, i just want to document that this is the most perfect moment of my life. this right now. all the stars lined up and made everything more amazing than words can express. im sad because i know i wont be this happy again for weeks, but right now, just being is enough.
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| Monday, November 22nd, 2004
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4:12 pm
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hey babies!!!! im back for turkey. i got back on saturday, and had this whole long-planned superfast process involving running throught the airport and deborah waiting to speed me over to the lower school to get to the play in time. i was still a little late but there was nothing i could do. EVERYONE IN THE PLAY was faboulous! you are were awesome... kate noel you were so fucking funny when you flipped out at that one part, and emma and ellie you were the best psychos ever. jack you were fantastic, i dont even have to tell you that. as i was sitting there there were a buncha moms behind me that kept going "that boy is so talented" and stuff like that, and i was so tempted to turn around and be like "thats my jack!" but yea... that was fun... the cast party was fun, lol i love that im not in the cast and i was there... i saw adam berg and he actually remembered me and hugged me and talked to me and everything - that was awesome... a highlight of the night. lol another thing i just remembered was jack showing me to the fridge with all the pop and stuff and he goes you can have whatever you want, and i go "can i have a heineken?" just kidding.... except im not...." and he closes the fridge as i kinda sit there and drooled, lol. after that i came home to my new house for the first time and i had a wee meltdown... i got very sick and upset when i realized that all my stuff was now in this house and everything had changed around me. it was just an icky feeling, and i couldnt sleep for hours. eventually i had to pretend i was back at my school, saying goodnight to my roommates and falling asleep to the same music i always fall asleep to. i even set my alarm for the same time i do at home. GAH im not gonna erase that cuz you have to know how much it creeps me out that i keep calling that place home. but yea, i meant school. ooh its 4:20. wanna kno something funny? if its 4:20 and u ask the teachers what time it is, they always say 4:21 or 4:25 or something... its funny. oh sigh... what else has happened. well yesterday i was uber crabby cuz i had to stay home and unpack allll day, and then "family night" turned into me renting superstar and watching it alone in my room after talking to my friends all night... i love everything about night. that was so random, i didnt even plan on saying that, lol weirdness. anyway.. today i shopped all day... I GOT POINTE SHOES!!! they're so beautiful. im freakishly in love with them... im so excited to learn how to use them, lol. i also bought hanukka cant spell... presents for zoe and christmas presents for my dormies, lol... then i went to target and had myself a little party getting shampoo and toothpaste and other such things ive run out of, lol. ohhhhh i also went to cheapo and got the new simple plan cd, the new jimmy eat world cd, the new vanessa carlton cd, and another copy of the garden state soundtrack because i lost mine the day after i got it, lol. ummm can i say im IN LOVE with the jimmy eat world cd???? im gonna post some lyrics up here later. i freaking love it. lol im still in the habit of saying freaking instead of fricking cuz of my damn school. i also got the new insiders book... if u havent read the insiders you should, its tres good. aaand i went to starbucks today and yesterday, and then picked len up at school, lol... i was blasting simple plan like super loud and all the parents were looking at me. i pulled up and rolled down the window and leonard saw me and his friends all pointed and were like "blah blah something your sister!!" and he got embarrased crap i g2g ill finish this later!!! LOVE
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| Friday, October 22nd, 2004
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11:39 am
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IM AT A GAS STATION IN EAST BURK! I LOVE YOU ALL!!! WRITE ME!!! -meggie
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| Sunday, October 10th, 2004
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10:58 am - one last thing...
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your smell
lingers in the air
i could turn around
i just dont care
to see you walk
away from me
away from everything
i have to go
this i know
but i cant seem to let go
so let me hold you
for a while
you can make me smile
and dry my tears off with your lips
i wont ever lose my grip
i wont ever let you
go away
again
and when im gone
will you still try
to dry the tear drops from my eyes
will you still hold me
and say
you wished id never gone away
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8:25 am - goodbye again
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i had all this fucking shit i wanted to say. i wanted to write about my entire weekend, and now... i have to leave in like half an hour for church, im not packed, im fucking hungover, and im about ready to slit my wrists. i dont even want to get into it but im the biggest idiot in the world. im not even trying to play the guilt trip thing, i really am stupid. what i did last night all seemed totally fine and fun and stuff until i fucking completely blew off jack in the worst way and fucking... god i dont even know. i feel so guilty i honestly wanna die. i didnt spend any time with my fucking family, i didnt even START to move into my new house... all last night i just argued with my mom... AND i broke curfew by 2 hours last night. im gonna fail my u.a. today cuz i fucking drank so much, and i just cant handle any of this. why the fuck do i have to go back to this place. i honestly... well not honestly honestly, but i seriously think i would rather die. ive been counting down the hours til this weekend since i got there... every single night all i thought about was seeing everyone on thursday morning... and now what. thanksgiving is 6 more weeks away and i dont think i can make it. i really dont. im strong but im not that strong. i just wanna be here where i know im loved, even when i fuck up terribly like i did last night. FUCK. alright, i have a couple things from earlier this weekend i can put on here.....
i'll be back around 9 because megan fuckin king is back in town and i love her more than.......my family.
GAH MY HERO IS HOME!
but only till sunday :-(
that was katies away message... i felt special but reading it now i feel like i shouldnt be anyones hero
“and I can’t wait to see your new boobs!” – deborah
i didnt even GET to see deborah... i was so fucking busy doing shit i thought was more important i hardly even talked to her.
11:52 pm
Friday
Tonight was the most perfect night ever. I cant describe it. I always say it’s the most perfect night, but it always gets better. Tonight was amazing. I cant describe the way im feeling right now. its kind of like I could die and that would be perfectly ok with me. it’s the closest thing to perfection ive ever experienced.
...
...
I never wanted this night to end but now that its over im just basking in this feeling.
...
Feelings are all relative and the way I feel when im in his arms will always be highest it gets for me. the most amazing feeling in the world.
(theres not really the ...s i left out most of the entry cuz well... i didnt write it for everyone to see, lol i wrote it just so i can always remember)
i dont know what else to say. i feel like im going to death row or something so theres no point in me even trying to do everything i didnt get a chance to. i know its not that extreme and im not trying to make anyone feel bad for me, but i cant stand the thought of going back there and missing out and even more than i already have. im missing halloween... and i have the hottest costume ever... no election and i care so fucking much about who wins and how it all works out... im not even gonna fucking know. im missing my moms birthday and i fucking treated her like shit this weekend. i cant fucking show her how much i love her and how much she means to me. two days after her birthday its "cancer day" aka 3 years... yea 3 since she was diagnosed. im missing that too. im missing moving. i fucking leave in like an hour and im not ever coming back to this house. fuck i really just wanna fucking die. i cant do this. i cant. everyone write to me. shit.. if anything happens to me everyone kno that i love you all. thanksgiving is 6 weeks away.... 6 weeks. jack - i dont blame you if you think im the lowest person after last night, and i dont think you do, but maybe you should... i dont know... anyway - since ur one of the only people that read this anyway, you kno i love you and i cant believe im missing your entire life right now... you can send me faxes every day and vent everything. i will write back to every single one, i promise.
here this was something i wrote on saturday morning - i was gonna give you a whole letter but ill just put it here. its kinda like that letter u said u wrote me the day after i left... it doesnt really count as a letter i guess... just feelings i had to get out....
jack – I woke up with a knot in my stomach this morning, I cant shake this feeling. I can’t stop thinking about you. Please don’t let me go back. I don’t want to leave you. We’re never gonna be able to do last night again. why was it so perfect? Why do I feel so different when im with you… so right. I feel like that’s how it belongs. “when im with you, I feel like I could die and that would be alright” ive been repeating that line in my head all night… it wont stop. Its so true though. What if something happens to one of us. what if there’s another car crash… what if my heart stops. What if this is goodbye forever…
i cant never think beyond that point. im crying now. i cant stop. i have to go. ill love you forever... until the world falls into pieces, and even after. goodbye again
yours,mk
current mood:  heartbroken
current music: “for us, there’s never a last song”
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| Thursday, September 23rd, 2004
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5:37 pm - Fall Foliage is Beautiful, But Nothing Cures Homesickness
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Hello everyone! This is Jack! Im one of Megan's really good friends. As most of you already know, Megan is away at bording school in the middle of Vermont, without phone, or internet. She and I have been communicating through snail mail though. In her last letter which I recieved today, she asked for a favor. She asked me if I could update her journal and tell you about her. So, let me present, the grand spectacle, Megan King.
jack-
im in the art room. the sun is shining on the mountains. its beautiful. 'hear you me' is playing on the stereo and I thought of you and evan, and summer, and living, and driving, and feeling alive.
"On sleepless roads the sleepless go,
may angels lead you in"
i miss living with my friends. feeling my heart swell when im with you. i miss feeling that way. we are going to take a trip to new york this summer together, ok? we are going to see Wicked and not let anything stop us from having fun before you leave 'for good'.
"Who can say if i've been changed for the better,
because I knew you,
I have been changed for good"
sorry :) ill finish this tonight. i miss you.
hi. it's tomorrow, lol. i had a weird thing happen yesterday after i wrote that part of the letter, i think i told you about what happened when i went to the cemetary to see sam before i left, well the song i had on repeat during that whole thing came on and i couldn't breathe. i turned red and got all flustered- it was weird. so anyway, i've been meaning to tell you my roommate anya IS vanessa castellanos. she looks so much like her, and acts exactly like her. its SO weird. so im not allowed to leave campus 'til i've been here for 90 days. today is my 17th day (last week). grrrr...sorry this is so random, im having a hard time focusing. ooh guess what? i learned how to play 'Hey Ya' on the guitar yesterday! it's really cool, lol. i saw 'The Dead Poets Society' here on movie night the other day. that's a fabulous movie! im starting a movie club here, im excited. my friend zoe is helping me look into Kabalah, lol how cool is that? i have a Kabalah bracelet, i wish you could meet her, i can see you guys really getting along. lol, she just said to tell you she loves you. i talk about you alot and i hope you write me soon! im gonna do my precalc hw now, but i'll write more later.
k, im back at the dorm. i had my first meeting of my film club today. it sucks cuz we cant see R rated movies and most good ones are R. oh well. im choir tonight we sang this song and the lyrics really struck something with me. i wanted to share them with you...
"i may wander far and wide
with the stars my only guide
but i will find my way back home
i may leave and i may grow
but no matter where i go
i will find my way back home
though ive gone so far away
i'll return again someday
i will find my way back home
we will never be apart
i will hold you in my heart
i will find my way back home"
it's so true. but it's lights out, so i'll finish this later. goonight!
ick. i just got in trouble for showing too much skin, lol sounds like the good old days, doesn't it? hold on. sry, that pen was bugging me, lol but jack, you don't understand- im wearing a button up shirt, lol i didn't know you could possibly show too much skin with one of those! i had too many buttons unbuttoned i guess, lol you know me- always the skank. i also had a non-metal bracelet on one wrist and "write science paper" written on my hand, so i got called out for that too! I MISS EXPRESSING MYSELF! through my clothes, accesories, nail polish, music, gah! sorry, i just had to get that out there. this letter is so long, see i figured it would be better to write a long one since it takes so long for them so send it. i'd rather make it worth waiting for, lol. not to mention i dont have anyone im telling things to on a regular basis, or my livejournal! i miss it so much! well once again, im gonna work on some homework. more later.
oh back at the dorms once again i will send this letter tomorrow, so this will be the last i write. also the last letter i write until i hear from you. not in a mean way, just in a "this must seem obsessive" way. i had ballet tonight so that made all the bad parts of my day sort of melt away. it relaxes me so much, im so glad i found it. ive been thinking about everything at home im missing....im honestly so sad i missed/will miss your lip sync, homecoming, the halloween dance, etc. if i could come home for the valentines dance, could i be your date, i mean guest, lol seriously though it would be such a nice thing to look foreward to. i love the vdance so much. do you have any trips to canada planned? you should come visit me. it's GORGEOUS here with the leaves just starting to turn, but i should get going, it's almost lights out. i miss you so much and hope all is well. i really hope the seniors as a whole are doing ok. i worry about that alot. i know you guys are very strong but it still must be so hard. say hi to everone for me, emily sepler, jackie, christov, the dean, hehe ALL those people. i miss everyone SO much, it's insane. i love you with everything, never forget that.
Yours through it all,
Megan
OK everyone, it's me Jack again. I miss Megan so much, and it makes me frustrated because I've sent a letter and a package and it appears that neither of them have arrived yet. Well, Im hoping that they arrive soon. Everyone please write. When you are away from home, the smallest letter saying hello can make someone's day or week. Megan's address if you forgot is:
Megan King
King George School
2684 King George Farm Road
Sutton, VT
0586
Megan I miss you so much, I bet you can imagine. Ill write soon. Keep writing ok, be strong!
Love,
Jack
current mood: Missing Megan!!
current music: For Good, Wicked
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| Saturday, September 18th, 2004
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10:48 am
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omgomgomogmogm im at school in science shes not looking ahhhhhh this is so exciting i feel so weird!!! everyone write to me!!!!
megan king
king george school
2684 king george farm road
sutton, vt 05867
ahhhh i hate it here im soooo homesick. someone come pick me up! lol i miss the internet and my cell phone and car and ipod and food!! omg jen was updating and just got in trouble so im gonna just send this before i get cought holy crap i miss you all so much, jack might be updating on here g2g2 i love you all so much write!!!!!
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